Professor

Seahawks hope Calvin Johnson can slip to the 2nd Round

excerpt:

“Everybody here really has their fingers crossed that something good will happen for us,” said GM Tim Ruskell. “The way I see it, if Oakland goes with Russell and the Lions go with Joe Thomas and the Browns go with Brady Quinn and the Bucs trade down for some value picks and Arizona drafts someone else and the Redskins do something stupid, we feel like we have a chance at this guy. Long shot? Yes. That’s why we’re taking a pragmatic approach to it. If he falls to us, great. If not, we just won’t select anybody in that spot.”

Ruskell has already spoken to Johnson’s agent, Bus Cook, about possible parameters for a contract and signing bonus.

“We’ve had some preliminary talks with Bus and Calvin,” Ruskell said. “Looks like they’re going to want first round money even if they fall to the second round. Hey, I don’t blame him. The kid’s a blue chipper and he wants to be paid accordingly. We can just give him a nice signing bonus and a back loaded deal so if he’s a bust we can cut him after the first couple years. Of course, he’s not going to be a bust. It’s simply not possible. I read it on the internet.”

The Seahawks aren’t putting much stock into rumors that Tampa Bay, Cleveland, and Detroit are eyeing Johnson, since teams at the top of the draft often send out misinformation to conceal their true intentions.

“Never, ever put stock into what teams say before the draft,” Ruskell said. “Most of it is just misinformation. Look at me. I’ve been telling everybody that Calvin Johnson is 5’6 and 185 pounds and that he’s actually a punter from Montana State. Is it true? Maybe. Maybe not. See, this is called a ‘smoke screen.’ Now people aren’t going to know what to make of this guy.”

Since leaving school, Johnson has done everything in his power to prove he is worthy of being the top pick. Even if he goes second or third, the classy, humble receiver has promised to sign with whichever team picks him.

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J-Unit

The day that happens, pigs will be flying.

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University of Tennessee Lady Vols 2007 National Champions

Professor

Dude, it's a phony story, it is supposed to make you laugh, you already know this though, right?

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J-Unit

Oops, I just posted based off the article title.

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University of Tennessee Lady Vols 2007 National Champions

Professor

If you read it, it is hilarious.

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erikfootball51

Ahahahahahaha. That was a great article. If only every other team in the league was the Lions. Then maybe Calvin would slip down to the Hawks.

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ball in the baskett

he wont go lower than 5

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gruntbygod

Taht was the best part

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Serrated Shadow

Wow, that belongs in the Onion.

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stormdriver

No.. If every other team were the Lions, the whole first round would be nothing but WRs, and Johnson would probably go at #12 or so.

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