They want me to heat this tool to 500 degrees...
So sit back people and i'll recite the spoken tale
Of the only Hammer that couldn't stand a broken nail.
Spittin' a description, i'm under pressure in crunch time
To roast Angelo the Canadian kid-that's already a punch line!
This northern Goober's always sendin' me gifts with dog jokes
Yet we know he follows the same commands from his ball coach
Hammer takes the pigskin and pounds through the defensive vicinity
Makin' sure he kept the rock! Too bad he lost his virginity
Does that explain the expression in his picture or what?
Well maybe his coach yelled "Hey number Thirty! You're Cut!"
But here's my advice man, take a lesson from the Tom Brady Drama
When you go for the sack, don't come back with a baby mama
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